whenever you’re in a situation where you need motivation just whisper “give ‘em the old razzle dazzle” to yourself and proceed to give ‘em the old razzle dazzle.
honor students cheat more than anybody
somebody in my school literally asked someone to prom by shaving it into his horse with the harry potter font
you guys wanna see my finished essay?
yeah me too.
If Phil and Dan were punk-rockers part 2.
Phil: I put my tree up this week!
Dan: Was it good?
Phil: …you’ve seen it.
Phil is done with this pretending shit.
Every time someone asks what you want for Christmas answer one of the following:
-a sense of purpose
-a baseball mitt with pork rinds in it
-a dog with laser eyes
-adult supervision so I can finally play with my Legos
-the sweet release of death
-just start screaming or something
Okay that’s it and happy holidays from bustedabureau
The phrase “youre my missing link” is so confusing like what am I linking you to?